Enneagram tests stress me out

I don't like how my level of distress depends so little on my outside enviroment.
I'm so dangerously introverted in ways, ways that make it so it's completely possible for me to truly exist in my head.
to consider myself when i'm alone, and around others, practically two different people. That's something I would like to change.
But changing that feels impossible somehow.

I used to be able to exist in my world. I used to be the same consistant person through and through... And I'm guessing it's just because of my powerlessness towards my immidiate enviroment that causes me to be at such a loss of identity in social situations versus when i'm alone. But in my past, I was so comfortable in my life and enviroment because i'd created it all. I belonged in it so thouroughly because I had such control over it. So I guess I wasn't as independant as I thought? Well I know that now. I've recognized that.

I've recognized a lot of things that I thought to be true about myself to surprise me by not being true at all. That all my perceptions of past events were thouroughly flawed, self-serving, and crude.

Now, my very core problem is this: Since I've seemingly learned so much about myself -- past, present, and future -- I want to be able to keep the good parts of myself from the past, and blend them with everything i've learned in the present. How can I do that when the two sides seem so contrary? How could I possibly find a balance in that?

How do I find balance?
How do I find security?

I need to do yoga or something I worry way too much for my own good