Absolute joy

and optimism because:
for the first time in months I feel Mackenzie coming through
just a small, elusive presence of the person I thought I was, the person I lost
The person I know I am.
Just a fleeting feeling, but unmistakable.

Like many other times I'm sure,
you promised me something, promised to fix it.
And instead of instant assent,
something flared

She says: you are not in control of this
I should've never put you there
You do not command my well-being
Somehow I've let you
I am not dependant on you,
of course I love you, but that's different,
I am myself and I should not be hanging on these slippery words.
I should be making the promises to me,
with or without you.
You can come with me if you like,
but I'm going to the top again,

and this time, I'll never stop.

Now watch as I rebuild this broken city